How I Found A Boyfriend by Playing Sex Games

 

If you like Pina Colada’s or getting caught in the rain then you sure as HELL like sex games. But, who doesn’t like sex games? I certainly do. This is the story of how I actually got laid by the woman of my dreams all thanks to my love for sex games.

  • Finding That Special Someone

    It’s no secret that finding a fuckbuddy (especially a hot one) can be a pretty difficult task, but that shouldn’t discourage you from trying. It discouraged me, so instead, I just sat at home playing mobile porn games.

    I downloaded about 4 of them, assuming they’d keep me busy for at least a few hours. I got a couple I had seen clips of before and a couple that I’d never seen before but looked good. It’s about to be a really fun time, so I settle into my bed.

    All relaxed and comfy, I was ready to dive into what I thought was going to be a relaxing afternoon of hazardous levels of masturbation.

  • Modern Weaknesses

    People think we have it so great now what, with our fancy tablets and smartphones, wifi and smart TVs. But people who say that have obviously forgotten the one flaw in modern technology that has ruined thousands of lives before even my own.

    Forgetting this flaw, I used my saved up work money to buy myself a brand new speaker for me and my soon-to-be roommates… a Bluetooth speaker. Not just any Bluetooth speaker though. A waterproof one that can connect with a device from longer ranges. That’s right.

    As soon as I fire up my game I’m annoyed because I can’t hear the sound. I could softly hear it, but I thought my phone speakers were just getting bad so I turned them up. Little did I know; they were working fine… and so was my new speaker which was sitting comfortably outside with the power on and connected to my phone.

  • Mistakes and Rewards

    Alright, now keep in mind that I’m not even at MY house. I’ve been partying with my friends at my parents’ place for the past week while they’re in Hawaii, so I’m surrounded by the neighbors I’ve known since I was a child. Fuck.

    All I hear when I open my window is the sounds of some chick on my phone getting fucking P-O-U-N-D-E-D… until I heard another noise. A knock at my front door.

    It’s been years since I’d been that scared. Not since I broke my neighbors brand new lawnmower by driving it through a bunch of fence trimmings. I answered the door and who else could it have been beside the girl next door I had grown up with next door my entire life.

    She came over to return one of my friend’s phones that he has lost in her backyard. I couldn’t even look her in the eye, but then she invited herself upstairs to hang out for a bit, and one thing led to another and .. well.. Let’s just say; she comes over a lot now.

    Anyways… If you like makin’ love at midnight then try leaving your bluetooth outside like an idiot, and you just might be rewarded.

Posted on

Top 5 Best Racing Games Ever

1.) Daytona USA

A whole eight people are able to compete head-to-head on the deluxe setup at particular Dave & Buster locations with cameras that screen your competitors’ determined, distorted faces up for everyone to watch. This, itself could make a car game worth raving about, however this amazing arcade racer still sits on its throne twenty-three years after its kickass 3-D graphics and fast-paced gameplay took the Earth in its grip and altered people’s perspective of what a racing game could be. It also should be mentioned that the racing alone is an addictive, slide-filled ride, sort of like a fever dream rendition of NASCAR.

2.) Trials Fusion

Fusion is a Trials with an easier learning curve than its displayed in the other two console editions, however, it climbs beautifully, including stages that go in perfect synchronicity with your blooming skills. Through the designs of the different levels and timing, Fusion is always pushing you to play at your own pace, and it is exactly that, that makes the game so great, and so insanely moreish. Victory is only ever one more try away from this current one. At least, that’s the way it feels when playing this classic game.

3.) Gran Turismo 6

Besides just a few tiny tweaks to the graphics and miniature changes in gameplay, both Gran Turismo 5 and Gran Turismo 6 are identically the same as one another. However, the newest Gran Turismo contains more than one thousand useable cars, from street-heavy production vehicles to sporty super-cars, hundreds of missions that offer endless loads of playability and a simulation mode with license road tests that could make a grown man shed tears of frustration. The game includes one of the best drifting mechanics in a video-game, along with some spectacular tire-smoke effects that’s available in a simulation title. The blend of NASCAR, rally car races, pro-circuit runs, street races, and everything else between all that makes Gran Turismo an easy-pick for this list.

 4.) Forza Horizon 3

Forza Horizon 3 is more set apart by its concentration on group play. Online, you’re able to discover the bountiful landscape of villages and twisting mountain streets yourself or you can connect with friends and explore a huge selection of challenges and races. The game wasn’t made to lean more towards the die-hard sim fan, so the in-game physics aren’t as solid as, like, iRacing’s, yet they’re still pretty sweet and the game will make just about anybody who adores playing driving games smile. Yes, Forza Horizon 2 includes an original journey among car-focused games, permitting you to race trucks through a forest in one moment and push a mid-engine supercar across an open freeway the next.

5.) Project Cars 2

Project CARS 2 is the second game in the best-selling and critically-adored series CARS motorsport franchise which was made by Slightly Mad Studios. Building on the victorious results from 2015’s chart-stomping, multi-platform ProjectCARS, Project CARS 2 bring the series and its fanbase into a heavy new world of motorsport simulation using the largest track list ever seen on any console, seen today as the greatest racing video game and a wholly renewed out-of-the-box gamepad adventure.  motorsport disciplines, 29 motorsport series, 180 cars from dozens of elite brands, and over 140 revolutionary “living”, organic tracks in 60 locations, to bring you the most authentic racing game ever devised.

This is your Ultimate Driver Journey.

Watch the video below to see new racing games coming out in 2018!

Posted on